Society’s Role in our Self-Confidence

This is from The Self Confidence Workbook by Barbara Markway, PhD and Celia Ampel with my thoughts added. 

Many media messages are designed to make us feel lacking. Companies that want to sell you products usually start by making you feel bad about yourself, often by introducing a “problem” with your body that you would never have noticed otherwise. 

Now that social media has become such an important part of our culture, the messages hit closer to home. It’s easy to believe that everyone around you has the perfect marriage, a dream career, and supermodel looks to boot. But remember: What people post online is heavily curated and edited. Everyone has bad days, self-doubt, and physical imperfections. They just don’t show these things on Instagram. 

I know I have seen friends on social media who seem to have it all together. Over the years, I watch them get married, advance in their careers, have children and seem to have the perfect lives. I recently found out that one of those couples in actually in the middle of a nasty divorce due to one person’s drug use, gambling problem, and multiple instances of infidelity. This is something I never could have guessed by their social media postings. I am sure you can think of examples of this in your own life. 

On a sad note, recently there have been many news stories about people taking their lives. Some of these people were public figures who no one would have expected. Often their public lives seemed perfect, despite the fact that they were clearly struggling inside. Remind yourself that comparing yourself to others’ social media is not a fair comparison. 

Do you find your self-esteem heavily affected by society? Does social media contribute to negative feelings about yourself? How can you limit society and social media’s influence on how you perceive yourself?